Help the McMahons, please! (Not)

by: V

Last night there was a storm in northern Illinois and I couldn't sleep. I got up and turned the TV on to CNN. The day before I had seen an advertisement for the Larry King interview with Ed McMahon. The snippet said something about possible foreclosure. I missed that show but had thought about it a couple of times during the day. Wondering just how that could happen and since it was the middle of the night and it was on, I sat down and watched the interview. I thought I would re-write the interview. More accurately than was portrayed on Larry King's CNN show.

During the show McMahon said: There's a lot of people who have problems and I'm hoping that this will help them help themselves. That's what my plan is. Of course I want them all to look at my life and see how I've made millions of dollars and how well I've done saving for my old age. I've hired advisers and they are my saving grace.

His wife Pamela, sat beside McMahon with teary eyes. Oh boo hoo... At one time during the interview she mentioned something like- We've been married for a long time.... and booo hooo... I've never owned a house before I married Ed.... and booo hooo....and people think we have a lot more than we do... and booo hooo.... oh and the listing for our poor little homestead states: "The master suite, with his and hers baths and closets, overlooks the yard and sweeping canyon." Ahh, ahh, I just can't bear to loose our little home.

Oh my and my poor decrepit husband, he's 85-and hasn't been able to work since he broke his neck 18 months ago. Boo... hoo...

I just cant believe we're only $644,000 behind in payments and the mortgage was only $4.8 million dollars... booo...hoo...and I just can't understand how this happened...

McMahon chimes in- the toxic mold in the house has been cured. We got $7.2 million, but we had nine lawyers and they took all of our money. But I want to say, it's not buyer beware. Just because our dog is dead don't worry, the mold is gone. Trust me on that.

But again, I've always spent more money than I've made. I've been a womanizer and thought I could do no wrong. I've been divorced a couple of times and of course the economy played a big role in the foreclosure notices. You can plainly see how we are not at fault for any of this mess.

Pamela follows with: You know, we always like to take care of our friends. We've had a champagne budget and of course we like to wine and dine our friends. Impressing people with false information has always been our modes operands.

This just can't be true. People are saying that it's our own fault. I just don't' believe it. I'm not a gold digger. Ohhh....boooo.... hoooo.... I just can't sleep at night and poor Ed, what will he do if he looses his home?

Well Mr. McMahon and Pamela, this author would like to say - I'll loose sleep tonight over the housing crunch but it won't be because people like you who have lived the high life, who have over extended themselves, who live in a six-bedroom, five-bathroom, 7,000-square-foot house, who believe that you are unaccountable to anyone one, who thinks that the government should help you.

It will be for the mothers and fathers of this country who work every day for minimum wage of $7.50 an hour, who pay their bills on time, don't buy a bigger house than they can afford and who don't drive BMW's, Hummers and have 10 dogs!

Someone, please come to the McMahons rescue. (Not)